- Have a calming influence. It’s easy to fall into the habit of self-directed concern when in social situations.
- Quit habits that bring you shame. Much of our sense of confidence is developed in moments when we needn’t perform.
- Listen beyond the words. Most people are not present in conversations.
- Reveal less about you. What happens when you’re hell-bent on telling everyone about every dirty aspect of your life?
- Open up physically. You may be nervous, but if you’re closed to another person physically and psychologically, this will unlikely be felt as warmth by others.
- Soften your face. I’ve been known to tighten up when speaking with people, and my expression can be too intense.
- Make others look important. A counterintuitive concept in human behaviour is that those who appear important often make others look important.
- Slow your movements. I can be a twitchy little creature when I’m nervous, especially after a coffee. Speaking and moving in quick, jerky movements is normal for many.
- Ask a question few others ask. Most people jabber on about themselves and their problems.
- Ignore complaining, drama and disrespect. Many of us fall into negative and critical speaking habits.